I'm an acronym! How ya like me NOW?!?

My daughter has discovered that, although she has a unquenchable need to be near me at all times, I am really quite boring. We have been going completely stir crazy lately, and I've become the Cranky Woman Formerly Known As Mom. So, I have devoted the entire last 15 minutes searching out various activities to get her brain and body busy and stimulated. Besides, I can only take so much Sesame Street and Dragon Tales before the guilt and incessant chatter make my head burst.

Oh, yes, the guilt. Now there's a subject I can devote at least 5 sentences to. When you become a parent, even before your water breaks, you are bombarded by guilt, from all sides. While pregnant with my first, although I knew it was bad and awful, I just couldn't stop myself from eating a chocolate cream pie. An entire chocolate cream pie. By myself. In under 15 minutes. I cried myself to sleep, fully aware that because of my one moment of weakness, my child would come out with 7 fingers, all on one hand, and grow up to be the kind of person who double dips potato chips and scratches himself in public. He has the correct number of digits, and they are all in the right places, so I guess I dodged a bullet on that one.

And he doesn't scratch himself in public. Much.